[14:58] Peeter: Njoh, kohvile keegi ei tulnud?
[15:08] Rommy™ @ Work: Nope...
[15:08] Rommy™ @ Work: F*ing basterds .!
[15:09] Peeter: Sul on vale lähenemine, on vaja kutsuda alkole
[15:09] Rommy™ @ Work: Why is it that I have a lot of friends, good friends... But still I feel like the lonelyest person alive .?
[15:09] Rommy™ @ Work: No oleks kutsunud alkole, kui oleks midagi pakkuda .! xD
[15:09] Rommy™ @ Work: Kui oleks alkole kutsunud, siis raudselt oleks sina esimene mu ukse taga .! xD
[15:11] Peeter: Haha, naah, ma sain oma mõõdu täis reedel. Vastates sinu küsimusele, sul on illusioon sellest, et sa ei ole täiuslik ja oled üksik, sest sul ei ole kedagi kõrval. Sa arvad, et sa ei ole whole without your "other half" tõde on see aga, et asi ei ole nii. Peab õppima nautima ennast kui inimest ja mitte mõtlema sellele, mida ja keda ei ole ja hindama seda mis on
[15:16] Rommy™ @ Work: It's not that I feel uncomplete or something... It's just boring without someone else by my side... Yeah it's all fun and games if I have my shows... But the moment they end and there is nothing else to do it's not so fun anymore...
[15:17] Peeter: Well life is not fun and games all the time, most of the time actually. Me arvame, et kõikidel teistel on superlahedad elud ja meie oleme ainukesed kes tulevad peale tööd koju ja istuvad arvuti ekraani ees kuni magamaminekuni, vms. Reaalsus on aga see, et enamuse meie sõprade ja tuttavate elu möödub samamoodi
[15:20] Rommy™ @ Work: Just like the saying: "In our lonelyness we are actually all together" või midagi sellist .! I do know and accept that everyone's life may-be as boring or more boring than mine, but that little detail still does not make me feel any better .!
[15:23] Peeter: I'd like to see what you would have to say about all of this when you'd be with someone over half a year and then that person would put you through the crap that I had to go though. Wonder, would you still want someone next to you?
[15:24] Peeter: See, what you got to have with E were the first steps into a relationship, the first moment are always the best ones, but as you saw and hopefully learned by seeing what happened with me and R, that NOT how it will last at all
[15:25] Peeter: I am so glad that I am not in a relationship, although I know I am ready for one, but there just isn't anyone suitable for that, all of them are just to hang out with or have fun with.
[15:25] Peeter: But I have learned to enjoy my own company I guess
[15:26] Rommy™ @ Work: I think the answer would be yes...Even though I don't know all the little details that were between you two, I still saw what you two had and I want it... And no relationship is without it's fights, so if I want love then I have to accept the downsides to it... And it's still better than sitting alone .!
[15:27] Peeter: Well I mean, if I do feel lonely, I'll invite someone over and that's fixed.
[15:28] Rommy™ @ Work: Yes, but what if noone would come .?
[15:28] Peeter: Then life goes on
[15:30] Rommy™ @ Work: Yes, life does go on... But I'm not you...Most of the weeks I see my people only on Friday (if you count out work and school) ...So I'm forced to suck it up 6 nights per week... And it's getting to me...
[15:32] Rommy™ @ Work: At first I was so happy to live an independent life, but it's slowly going downhill...
[15:32] Peeter: Well then do something about it, hakka arendama midagi kellegiga kes sinu jaoks sümpaatne ja kui sellist inimest pole, siis eks on elul keegi varuks aga hiljem sinu jaoks. Nagu ma alati ülten, kõik omal ajal, pole vaja takka midagi kiirustada.
[15:35] Rommy™ @ Work: I'm doing everything I can... Mul on kontod paljudes kohtades, vahel harva käin jutukates, kuid enamus otsib vaid seksi seal, so it's a no deal for me... Sõbrad on lihtsalt sõbrad ja neil pole aega muudel päevadel kokku saada just minu töögraafiku pärast...
[15:38] Peeter: It all depends on the attitude. Sul võib olla igalpool kontod ja ikka tunned, et sa oled ükskik ja üksi ja samas sul ei pea kuskil kontod olema ja sa võid olla täitsa rahul oma eluviisiga
[15:39] Rommy™ @ Work: No kui sul kontosid pole, siis tähendab see kahte asja: 1) sa kas ei otsi kedagi või 2) sa oled inimene, kes on julgem ning tutvud teistega klubides või muudes kohtades
[15:41] Peeter: Kõik ALATI otsivad kedagi
[15:41] Peeter: Ma arvasin kaa, et ma ei otsi aga sain aru, et asi pole selles, asi selles, et pole kohand senini inimest kes paneks minu südame puperdama.
[15:44] Rommy™ @ Work: 1) Palun ära võta minu senist juttu vingumisena .! Omaarust ma praegu ei vingu, vaid lihtsalt arutlen .! 2) Sama lugu on minuga .! Kutid, keda olen siiani kohanud ja kellega olen jalutamas käinud on lihtsalt okei . Ma ei otsi midagi spetsiifilist . Tahan lihtsalt, et kohe alguses oleks mingi selline eriline tõmme, mis paneks seda inimest igatsema juba peale esimest kohtumist. Mis tekitaks zha zha zhu'd...Siiani olen käinud jalutamas kuttidega ja peale esimest tundi juba hakkan mõtlema sellele, et tahaks juba koju ära minna...
[15:47] Peeter: Arusaadav, ma ei võta seda kui vingmisena. Aga jah, eks mul ka selliseid juhuseid olnud aga nujah, mõnega juttu pole aga on muus klapp, mõnega vastupidi aga enamusega olen säilitanud piiri, et kus me lihtsalt tunneme üksteise seltsis hästi, mitte mingi seksi mõttes aga lihtsalt, inimesed kellega saab niisama olemist nautida. Ja sama ka minul, pole seda boomshakalaka't siiamaani kellegiga olnud aga ma ei oota seda pingsi, elu peab nautima, mitte muretsema ja pingsalt ootama seda inimest kes tekitab selle "erilise" tunde, all in it's own time
[15:48] Rommy™ @ Work: H8 waitin'...
[15:50] Peeter: Mida rohkem sa ootad, seda minarust vähem midagi tuleb sinu poole, naudi elu nagu on ja ära pingsalt mõtle ja oota. See on ka omamoodi challenge hinnata seda, mis on, kerge see pole aga kui selle saavutad, oled palju kordi rahulikum
[15:52] Rommy™ @ Work: 4 me... There's a plan. A lifeplan... My final destination is a family - a child (or two), a loving partner and a dog .! And if I can't see future with the guy then there's no way I'm gonna stay with him...Ja siiani on ainult E olnud kutt, kellega olen korraks näinud tulevikku . But since he's in the past now ...But i feel the pressure, that the clock is ticking...I don't want to be 50 and a parent of a baby... I want my child(ren) to be (a ) teenager(s ) or a grownup(s ) by that time...
[15:53] Rommy™ @ Work: I want, what most women want... But in Estonia it's not easy (aka impossible) to get it... That's why I'm not gonna stay here forever... That's why I want go fuck off as soon as I possibly can...
[15:54] Peeter: Haha, you close to your menopause? It doesn't depend on where you are dear, you can be in Zimbabwe, you're still you, it's not about so much the place as the person himself.
[15:55] Peeter: Well I hope you will get all of this and that at one point that image would not be broken by the reality of life and that even if it will, you'll be strong enough to cope with it and move on.
[16:03] Rommy™ @ Work: The only thing that is bringing me down are the Laws of Estonia... That I can't get married in here... At least with a man...Minu unistuste ja tüüpilise naise unistustele võib tõmmata võrdusmärgi. Me mõlemad tahame sama asja. The only thing is that I can't fulfill my dreams in Estonia... At least not in my lifetime... So to get what I want I have to leave my home and start a new life somewhere where I could do all that...
[16:04] Peeter: Ah, the gays will always have something to bitch about
[16:04] Peeter: Kui ei ole see, on midagi muud, saavad selle õiguse, siis järgmine teema, jne.
[16:04] Rommy™ @ Work: Not only we, but people in general .! It's human nature to bitch about something .!
[16:05] Peeter: Inimesed jah, ei ole kunagi rahul sellega, mis on.
[16:06] Rommy™ @ Work: I just want a normal home with a normal family... The only difference is that I want it with another man... And that is the only thing that is "unusual"...
[16:07] Peeter: Wish for it, don't WANT.
[16:07] Rommy™ @ Work: It's the same thing, isn't it .?
[16:07] Peeter: No, it is not
[16:08] Peeter: Do you say "I WANT you a Merry Christmas"?
[16:08] Peeter: Wishing is more selfless than wanting is.
[16:10] Rommy™ @ Work: What is wrong with wanting to find someone to love me and take care of me and to find someone who I could love and care for the rest of my life .?
[16:11] Peeter: Nothing, just better WISH for it, than WANT it All people seem to do is want, want, want.
[16:13] Rommy™ @ Work: It is better to wish, but that's just human nature to want something...But I see nothing wrong with wanting my dreams to come true... It's just more ambitious to want it, than to wish for it .! If you want something then you WANT it bad... If you wish for it then you accept the fact that it might not come true...
[16:14] Peeter: You don't accept the fact that it might not come true?
[16:16] Rommy™ @ Work: No .!For me on of the reasons of me being alive is to love someone and to care for someone and to continue my familys name...And if I don't fulfil it then I've just been wasting time and air...
[16:16] Rommy™ @ Work: *onE of the reasons
[16:16] Rommy™ @ Work: Just like I said - family 4me is the final destination .
[16:17] Peeter: Dreamer like you are...
[16:17] Peeter: Well, I hope it will come true for you.
[16:19] Rommy™ @ Work: I do to... And every moment I spend alone, without a partner, is a wasted moment...
[16:20] Peeter: :)
[16:20] Peeter: I mean... :(
[16:30] Rommy™ @ Work: That's why all this lonelyness brings me down and a lot... 'Cause I've got bigger goals that just finding a partner...And yes I am a dreamer, but since moving to Tallinn, I've become A LOT more realistic (most of it thanks to you ), but still I'm never gonna stop being a dreamer .!
[16:34] Rommy™ @ Work: Okei, aga ma nüüd siis msn'ist välja ja hakkan tööd tegema .! xD I wish you all the luck in the world .!
xoxo Rommy
Paloma Faith - Play On
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